Wednesday, February 9, 2011

non serviam, motherfucker

1. Struggling to weigh in on Forsberg

(Most of my heroes do appear on a stamp.)

So the Avs have signed a 37-year-old player who had 1 assist in 4 games the last time he played high-level hockey (in this case, the winter olympics). This would ordinarily be a moderately puzzling but forgettable move, a team shoring up its depth by adding a low-level forward, somebody you'd hope would maybe win faceoffs or be really good in the corners or something.

But this 37-year-old is Peter Forsberg. I've had to remind myself how good--in fact, how great--Foppa once was. For me, his incessant injury-plagued comeback attempts, including tragic, depressing turns with the Flyers & the Predators, had ruined his legacy. But that act of his career, though probably still the last act, shouldn't overwhelm the earlier acts. Forsberg is a former league MVP, a guy who put up better than a point a game through the dead-puck era, a guy who once led the league in playoff scoring in only 3 rounds. On the ice, he combined the skills of both Sedins in one man, able to control the puck in a one-man-cycle that I've never seen another player manage. Forgetting what a stunning player he was redounds to my detriment, not to his.

Can he still play? I have no idea. I doubt it. I predict he'll put up a multi-point game his first game back (not tonight, apparently). Probably a three-assist game. And I predict he will play fewer than 20 games in the remainder of the season, and never play professionally again. But whatever. Medical science has completely reshaped the arc of professional careers: if this last brace of surgeries actually fixed his creaky wheels? Maybe his unparalleled hands & vision can make him a significant factor again.

And no matter what, I've talked myself into being happy to see him take the ice again. He was never my favorite player, but the moments I fell for hockey all included him--particularly watching him & Sakic trotted out there on the penalty kill, two sublime talents bending their games to do the dirty work & bail out their team (-mates). For reminding me of that, I'm glad to see the guy back.

2. On a modest proposal from Puck Daddy

(Evidently not in charge of discipline for the NHL.)

In the wake of yet another late hit, Greg Wyshynski proposes the following:

The next CBA negotiation should include the NHLPA allowing for an increase in financial penalties in lieu of man-games lost. The Players Association clearly doesn't want to see any "super suspensions" of its players, but the message has to be sent somehow. And uncapping the amount of fines a player receives on an injurious, illegal play is an effective way to send that message when you already have half the league bitching about escrow.

This is frankly bizarre. As an approach to (ahem) justice, it's a retrograde maneuver that I find utterly repellent in what purports to be a civilized society. To be clear: adding fines is all well and good. But "in lieu of man-games lost"? People, we've agreed that letting people pay fines without other consequences was a bad idea since 15fucking17.

Do I expect my rejection of indulgences for NHL players to gain any traction? Sadly, I don't. Apparently in our society, freedom from punishment can be purchased with money. Again. And neither in hockey nor anywhere else is there much of an audience for the 95 arguments against this horrifying practice.

--Collision, working on justifying the NHL's ways to man

Image courtesy of Wikipedia.
Other image courtesy of the IIHF.

1 comment:

Jew Grimson (AKA Bob Macajew) said...

Disputatio pro declaratione virtutis E.Kanum et Johnum Scottum:

or in the vulgar:

Bertuzzi Cooke's ass.